Beyond Arguments to Effective Communication

Beyond Arguments to Effective Communication

We should resist invitations to argue by recognising them for what they are: attempts by the other party to rescue themselves from unbearable feelings. Enjoying our YouTube videos? Get full access to all our audio content, videos, and thousands of…

The Lengths We Go To Avoid Love

The Lengths We Go To Avoid Love

The idea of trying to avoid love sounds paradoxical in the extreme: why do we take active measures to sabotage love? Enjoying our YouTube videos? Get full access to all our audio content, videos, and thousands of thought-provoking articles, conversation…

Why Nice People Repel Us

Why Nice People Repel Us

Why might kindness be so hard to bear? Why should warmth prove – on occasion – comprehensively repulsive? Why might nausea descend in the face of emotional maturity? Enjoying our YouTube videos? Get full access to all our audio content,…

Why We Behave As We Do

Why We Behave As We Do

A key principle governing the natural world is that animals adapt to thrive in particular habitats; what we call an animal’s character is essentially a set of traits that gives it maximal opportunity to flourish in specific circumstances. We humans…

Why Unloved People Hate Themselves

Why Unloved People Hate Themselves

What happens to a child who is not loved properly? The answer one might expect is that they start to hate the person who doesn’t give them the love they need. Far from it. The reality is that the child…

The Conditions of Love

The Conditions of Love

When looking at the odder aspects of other people’s and our own behaviour, there is one simple-sounding question we should always keep close to the front of our minds: what did you need to do in your family of origin…

5 Questions to Ask Yourself Every Evening

5 Questions to Ask Yourself Every Evening

It is estimated that some 70,000 separate thoughts hurry through consciousness from the moment we wake up to the time we slip into sleep. To help us understand those thoughts we’ve produced five questions to direct our minds to areas…

The True Cause of Obsessive Thinking

The True Cause of Obsessive Thinking

We all are, at times, the victims of one of the cruellest and most remorseless of all mental afflictions: obsessive thinking. But why? Enjoying our YouTube videos? Get full access to all our audio content, videos, and thousands of thought-provoking…

Immune Gut & Brain
How to Become a More Interesting Person

How to Become a More Interesting Person

We tend to evaluate people on how interesting they are. But we are thereby liable to miss a more acute and relevant issue: how interesting does a given person make us feel? Why in the company of some do our…

2 Unexpected Ways to Stop Sabotaging Yourself

2 Unexpected Ways to Stop Sabotaging Yourself

We often observe self protective strategies in ourselves with a mixture of puzzlement and embarrassment. Why are we like this? Why can’t we be more normal? What’s up with us? Our newsletter is a treasury of ideas: ideas that can…